WE WERE STILL living on Heussy Street when I started at Hutch Tech. The first day was full of emotion. Excitement, fear, but mostly I was riddled with anxiety. Would I begin to ugly cry if I got lost on the way to school or could not find my classroom as I did when I was in kindergarten? Would I make new friends? How would I make new friends? I had to make new friends so many times in my life; I should be able to do this by now. Would they know my secret? What if my secret came out? So many questions. I survived my first day at Tech, making some new friends, seeing some old friends from School #70 that I had not seen in the years since I had moved from the Edson Street slum. It was hard, but I made it. The first day came with many surprises. The biggest one of them all was learning that I would have to take a swim class and shower naked before getting into the pool. What would I do when I saw another naked boy up close in the locker room? Up to this point, getting changed in the school locker room only consisted of taking off my pants and putting on my gym shorts as quickly as I possibly could. What would happen when I had to get naked in front of all those other boys? The fear was palpable. I had never been naked in front of another boy before. Would I get an erection? Would they know my secret? The first day of swim class came, and I was paralyzed with fear. It was the period right before lunch, which also caused me stress. I would have to get dressed and get to lunch from the basement to the fourth floor in under three minutes; how would that be possible? I entered the locker room to the pool and kept my head down, making sure I did not look anyone in the eye or stare, gaze, glance at their blessings. I found an open spot on the bench and an empty locker. I quickly got undressed and went into the shower room. There were many firsts for me; the first time I would see an uncut penis, which confused me for days until I asked my father about it. The first time I saw a black penis; why were they all so much bigger than mine? It was the first time that I realized that Bob, and his many blessings, was not the norm when it came to penis size. They came in all sizes and colors, black, white, brown. It was the first time I saw an erect penis; thank you, Curtis, for that; he was always running around the locker room fully erect and loving the attention that it brought. Why was he erect? Was he like me? Was he gay? It was the first time that I saw designer underwear and boxer shorts. Until now, I had only known tighty whitey Fruit of the Looms. I can thank Jamie for introducing me to designer underwear.
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I am raising money for my next set of books. A series of children's books that teaches forgiveness. Please help me by donating to my Go Fund Me Campaign.